This got me thinking.
Why Do Men Cheat?
What could drive a married man to commit adultery?
What comes to my mind when I was thinking about this was the picture of a highly placed man suddenly seeing his secretary in a “certain way”
Or when a man sees a very attractive woman who he can not take his eyes off because she has all the natural curves in the right places.
Well, there are a lot of reasons why men cheat and understanding these reasons will help men generally to control the urge to cheat on their wives.
Below are some of the reasons
- Temptation From Other Women
When the man takes the bait, it doesn’t mean that he loves the woman. Most men who fall for this are weak. However, a man who is deeply in love with his wife and fully satisfied would not bother, he would bluntly tell the woman off.
- Your Wife Changed Physically
Behaviour and changes like this turns men off. Especially men who like fashionable women. For instance, personally, I don’t fancy women who tie wrapper and does the home chores.
Fortunately, I married a woman who has the same taste with me. She wears bumper shorts or a short knicker while at home at all times.
- Emotional Disconnection
So most women are in a better position to enhance the communication at home. They should find out how their husband is coping with work after the day’s work, Men long for it. Sometimes when a man cheats, it’s not because he is attracted to the woman sexually, but because the woman in question cares about his feelings or emotions.
- Denial of Sex From Wife
If you are a woman reading this and you are guilty of this, you may be sowing the seed for adultery in your home. While this should not be an excuse for a man to go sleeping around with another woman, every man should ensure they find out exactly why their woman is not available for sex and fix the problem instead of getting it from outside.
- Loss of Appreciation From Wives
A man can have all the money in the world but he can never get the type of consolation needed to make him secured than when he is appreciated by the woman he loves. So at every point in time, a man needs commendation from his wive for little victories in the marriage. The woman should let him know how important he is in the marriage and continously appreciate him in gestures, expressions, and sex.
- Some Men are “Adventurous”
Tips to help Men To Avoid Adultery
As a man, at one point in time, you have contemplated cheating on your wife due to so many reasons. If on the other hand you are fighting the urge not to cheat on your wife, the following tips will help you to keep your marriage clean of adultery.
1. Recall Why You Fell In Love With Your Wive
Before you got married, there is a quality you loved about your woman. What is that quality? Is she still manifesting that quality?
Recall your first date, the places you visited and occasions you attended that made it possible for your love to grow. Going back in time will help you to revive some of the feelings you had when you were wooing your wife.
2. Keep Your Relationship Exciting
How many times in a month do you take your wife out? If you have not been doing this, you are missing out on a very important area that could help you to re-connect with your wife on a personal level.
If you can make it a habit to take your wife out once or twice in a month, it will help a lot.
Where are the places you can go out with your wife?
- You can go to a beach to play.
- You can go for a meal or drink in a restaurant.
- You can take a walk together.
Time spent in these special times gives you enough time to rediscover your wife and fix problem areas in your marriage that may have been previously ignored.
3. Alway Be Honest With Your Wife
Honesty is the foundation of any solid relationship. When there is honesty and NO Secrets in the marriage, trust is established and the marriage foundation is fortified.
To be honest means communicating with/to your wife everyday about what happened at your place of work. Tell her of the little flirtatious comments you received from a woman in your office.
Tell her your reactions and what you did to ward off and discourage such comments.
Personally, this has helped me to avoid temptation from women most times. There used to be a woman who admires me whenever I go to the bank to do transactions. In fact she ensures that I’m attended to whenever I visit the bank.
Ordinarily, I felt she was doing her job till one day she actually showed me true signs that she was interested in me. The way she took a personal interest in me, and how she looks at me each time helped me to understand her intention before she voiced it.
I told my wife about it and we discussed it when I got home. My wife advised me to stop going to that branch. Initially, I wanted to ignore her advice, but when I thought about it deeply, I wasn’t ready for the problems this may cause so I stopped visiting that branch.
And because I was honest with my wife, I saved myself from a possible disaster of adultery.
4. Avoid Compromising Situations
If you know any situation will bring you into temptation to commit adultery, it’s better to avoid it.
What are compromising situations?
These are situations that will make it difficult for you to say NO when a woman tempts you to sleep with her.
Men are generally weak when it comes to women, especially when the prospect of having sex is involved. A man can feel excited about having sex with an attractive woman he doesn’t love.
However, when situations that can lead to these are avoided, cheating on your wife will never come to mind.
What are some examples of compromising situations?
- Being left alone with a female employee in the office after office hours.
- Giving lifts to attractive young women who may get your phone numbers while driving home from work.
- Going to lunch with the same female employee most times.
- Getting the visit of your female inlaw when your wife has traveled for few days.
- Spending too much time with a particular female in a lonely place.
- And so on
Though this point is interwoven with making your marriage exciting as explained above.
If you make it a habit to regularly communicate and spend time with your wife, all the loop holes in your marriage will be sorted out.
If you don’t spend time with your wife, deeper communication will not be possible. Communication helps the marriage mates to express themselves freely and clear any reservations that anyone may have.
It is the time to talk about errors, and things that matters in the relationship. If the man or woman is not happy, this is the time to discuss and find a solution. And this can be done when the man and his wife have private moments for themselves.
When a man does these things regularly, it helps the man to become emotionally satisfied and gives him the power and confidence to resist any temptation to cheat on his wife in the future.
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